October berry

Assalamu aleikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh dears :) how are u?

I have had some health issues, nothing dramatic but enough to keep me sunken in the sofa. That's why I haven't written anything, just been trying to manage. But alhamdulillah, I feel now a bit better so we get to chat again :) how are u doing, how's your weekend going?

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I have a strawberry plant on the balcony. I bought it from the supermarket in the start of summer, and ma sha Allah it very kindly gave me a fresh strawberry every now and then. What I didn't expect, is that it still keeps giving and is making more strawberries in the late month of October.. I'm not sure can it make a ripe berry but we'll see. It's been a very warm autumn, only now these days we get some cold air.

The cold feels good. I had been inside the whole day so I went to do the grocery shopping already which I planned for tomorrow, so I got a taste of the coolness and it felt so good. Summer is beautiful, but I like the warmth of a cosy sweater and my oversize jacket. Cold feels fresh and purifying. It's the opposite of sweating, I don't know how but it is, hehe.

Oh, and Lapland got their first snow ❄

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I need new gloves. Other than that, I try to not make any purchases, because I have everything I need, alhamdulillah. I can make good combinations with what I have, and I like the idea that I can shop at my own wardrobe. I have worn an abaya too! Many times :) 

I've paid a bit more attention on how people dress. It's kinda funny that I always think I stand out in some kind of wrong way, when actually people, at least here in Helsinki, have so many personal styles. And it's not only the youth, it's actually people closer to my age. It's nice to see people have become a bit bolder. Like today at the market I saw a lady with a tomato red wool coat, it looked great! 

Personality gives us power. A person who thinks on their own can't be controlled so easily. In Finland, the social norms are quite strict, but there's a lot of people who want to be their own boss and inspiration. I used to love breaking norms. Sometimes I forget that actually being visibly muslim by wearing a hijab is almost like a radical act in today's world here in the West. It's so normal to me now, after 11 years, that I forget what people might see when they look at me.

But yeah, it's my small jihad, non-violent protesting and also an act of worship. I lead my silent war by covering, boycotting, giving charity, signing petitions..

And then my own, inner war is the same old: acceptance, self love, growing, learning.

It's very hard to understand why a woman covering herself or/and wearing a headscarf is so triggering for people. Like some people see a person in hijab and start to get angry that someone's gonna force it on them. I don't feel like that though. If someone's wearing that (beautiful) tomato red coat, I don't get the feeling that now I must too..? I think some people just can't handle boundaries. 

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I hope you are doing great. I think my batteries start to finish.. give me a bit of time. In sha Allah things get easier again. Thnx for reading, next time then,

Aisha