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You make my days

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 Assalamu aleikum wa rahmatullah dears :) how are u? I swear I was going to quietly quit writing this blog. Like I have, couple times before. I kinda feel that I don't have so many readers anymore, so well, what's the point when I can just keep a regular diary/journal. But then there you are, dears, coming back again. And also some new ones too, alhamdulillah. I don't know who you are but you make my days ♡  ... I recently met my nurse and occupational therapist and had a good talk with them. I like them both and I am happy they seem to understand me well. We laughed and talked about my tortoise. Also talked about me and my future.  The amount of guilt and anxiety I am carrying for only not to be able to live a similar life than my peers same age.. something that necessarily doesn't even exist. I just wrote to one of my friends when she was struggling, that it's partly a generational experience for us millennials, to not have been able to succeed in life same way as...
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A hundred years

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Assalamu aleikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh lovelies :) how have you been? Alhamdulillah, I'm ok and if I'm not, I will be, in sha Allah. New year feels good. Today I went for a walk and cleaned the house. The turtle is doing fine, he woke up and is very energetic. I bought him some kale and he loves it.  ... Do you ever feel like you are hundred years old? I feel like I have lived through so many events and phases that sometimes I don't even believe everything has really happened to me.  I don't know where I took the energy and life to make everything happen. I guess when you really really want something, you will make it happen. This applies to relationships too. Yeah, a lot of history. Alhamdulillah it's good to stop sometimes to think where I've been and also where I could have ended up to be. So I turned out just fine, maybe not like the standard, middle class with a mortgage and complaints about inconveniences ;) I did read today about a lady who was liv...
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Clutter cleaning time

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 Assalamu aleikum dears :) how are you? Alhamdulillah, like I posted in Insta, I left home early this morning because maintenance came to fix the radiator. I went for some groceries and then a cup of latte. Usually I drink a cappuccino if I go to a cafe, or a 'regular one' meaning just plain coffee and oat drink. But latte gave me some more time. Then when I came home, I just started to take my scarf off and the maintenance guy was at the door.. can't flee these social interactions :) ... I know we muslims don't celebrate new year, but still we are living in this world and the year has changed as the common calendar says. Also Ramadan coming closer, alhamdulillah. Time to start fasting last year's missed days in sha Allah. But yeah, I think this is a good time to take a new start on things. Or start a new take.. however you want to put it :) For me it will look like waking up my minimalist side and clean the clutter at home, going through wardrobe, kitchen cabinets....
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Sweetie pie

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 Assalamu aleikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh all :) how have you been? It's been a couple of days, or well, it was the holidays as you know. I don't celebrate Christmas but it's always still a special time of the year. There's so many memories and so many sore spots about past Christmases, from the time I wasn't a muslim yet. Happy memories too of course. But it does remind me of the brokenness we experience. So I am happy we are past that now and it's time to turn our gaze to a new year in sha Allah. ... Today I was making some meat pies / pastries, however you like to call them. I'll share my recipe for the filling, it's simple yet very delicious. For the pastry you can make any type of butter dough, or also buy a ready one from the market, no judging here. This amount will be enough for 12-15 pieces. You'll need - 250g ground beef or chicken - salt - paprika  - black pepper - garlic powder - dried thyme - hot pepper (I didn't have it today, ...
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It doesn't take much but gives

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 Assalamu aleikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh guys :) how's your evening? I decided to write, just for a chat, because for some reason my Max doesn't work, Yle Areena doesn't work, Youtube doesn't work, and we don't also have a tv right now so what am I supposed to do 😟 My husband is sleeping so only quiet activity I could think of is journaling. I don't also want to go out because I was out already today lol. So we are stuck here! ... Today I kinda start to find my happiness again. It took some tears, few outbursts, love and comforting, and that one walk in the forest and I started to feel better again. My hormones are storming for some reason, and I think they partly are the reason for my problems lately, or at least that I have been quite moody. But anyways, alhamdulillah, now on the better side again. Don't give any side eye or evil eye, just be happy. (: it doesn't really take much. And this might not last long, even though I of course hope so. So...
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Downhill for the better

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 Assalamu aleikum wa rahmatullah :) how's your day going? I woke up early and also slept late, yes that's possible lol, and I have just done some chores and went for a walk in the forest. I feel better now, the walk did wonders and I already have more positive perspective.  ... When others go to work, I can spend easily that 9 to 5 stressing, worrying and being anxious.. not every day, but just saying, I do have an illness. It's a strange thing though. For some, they claim not to see it, and for some, it pushes them away. Well, alhamdulillah for both outcomes.. but I have been wondering how many of my close circle people are actually accepting me as I am. Or am I pouring from myself too much on them. I know it sounds harsh. But the fact is that a mental illness will affect on the person obviously, and the people around them. And it's not for everybody. Not everybody can understand how to deal with it. I have had to learn it by myself, and I'm still on that learning ...
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Tea and remedy

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 Assalamu aleikum dears :) how are u? I'm fine, alhamdulillah. I'm now getting used to this, that everything is actually alright. I know it doesn't sound a real problem, and maybe it isn't, but at least it's kinda strange that things go easy and everything is ok. Usually there's always some problems? But yeah, alhamdulillah.  ... My skin has been breaking out really bad lately, and I've tried some remedies. I ordered few things from Limepop. Jojoba oil, then some nettle powder for shampoo making, and shea butter. I've used only aloe vera + olive oil mix for my face, then added micellar water for cleansing and it seemed to work fine, for a while. But now I have had some painful pimples on my face and body and it makes me crazy. Painful and an awful feel.. so what I came up with, is firstly using Bio oil for the acne scars. Then secondly I made a new oil mix for my face with using 50-50 jojoba oil and organic extra virgin olive oil, and then I added around...
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