It's just me

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 Assalamu aleikum wa rahmaullahi wa barakatuh everyone. How's your day?


I have been feeling very sad lately. But I managed to do a few things today, like taking some old stuff to garbage and storage. I slept late and have mostly just been thinking about things.


...


I know very well what's this about. It's past, past things which make me feel so tired and somewhat shattered inside too. It's time and energy consuming too. So when this mode is activated, lol, I will just feel very sad and shed a little tear every now and then. I don't really want to get too much into this topic because it's very personal and my bad experiences are nobody's feed.

Also what makes me sad, is to see that I am always alone with my difficult emotions. I have no one to really turn to, when I need help. Some don't care, some don't want to help and, well, for some I don't want to tell and spoil their day even though I know they would care.

So I just let tears run down my face and treat myself like if I had a flu. I am ill now, so I need rest. Right now I'm waiting for my third cup of very, very sugary tea, it's on the counter. Days and times like this I just manage and that's it. Can't do much more. And tomorrow I'm supposed to go to boxing group, have to see how that's gonna go..


...


Alhamdulillah still. Things do change and pass, so probably this will too. But I don't have the energy to be brave or try to overcome anything. I'm just gonna drink my tea.


Until next time,


Aisha

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